Girl Gets Legs Cut Off At Six Flags

Just tonight I was talking about taking a trip down to Six Flags Magic Mountain this summer, and then this story comes up.

A 13 year old girl had her legs cut off at the ankle when a cable snapped on the 177ft high Superman Tower of Power at Six Flags Kentucky Kingdom and whipped them right off. Now, I could go on to explain this, but it would just be so incomplete. This lady does it with such accuracy and Kentucky eloquence that I'll just let her do it:

"We seen the cable break loose soon as it got to the top on the right-hand side. The people on the ride just came and hit the ground. As the ride came down, the wire swung left, struck the young lady on the back side of my children. When I got up there, the lady, she was just sitting there and she didn’t have no legs, she didn’t have no legs at all. She was just calm, probably in shock from everything."

Oh my, what grace she has when she speaks. And thank you for your expert diagnosis as well. Anyways, that's pretty crazy. But I was reading an article about it, and something struck me as I read on of the quotes. Here it is:

"Every park, one in a million maybe something happens," park visitor Kenneth Lay said. "But I have no fear."

Thank you, Kenneth Lay, for your insight... Hey, wait a minute, Kenneth Lay? Former CEO and Chairman of Enron? Hey I thought he was dead! But clearly he's not, as we all just read his testimony about the odds of roller coaster-related accidents. So all this time it was just an elaborate hoax, undoubtedly to get him out of serving jail time, but it turns out also to allow him more time cruising the theme park circuit. Good for you, Mr. Lay. You really pulled one over on us.