A Rant

So, we're having a party tonight for Cinco de Mayo. It's the day that Olive's people gained their independence, so we must celebrate it. Olive is Amanda's Chihuahua for those that don't know, and she is Mexican, so you get it. Anyways, to celebrate, we decided we wanted to get a keg. I have never gotten a keg before, but thought it was something I needed to do now that I was 21. Also, Bryan is hellbent on making a kegerator (fridge with a tap that holds a keg), so that was more inspiration. So Thursday we decided that we would go out and get one. I grabbed Jake and headed over to Springfield where the beer docks are. When we got there, we saw that it was cash only, and we were $2 short in cash of getting the cheapest one, and it was close to closing time, so we rushed to a gas station, got some cash, and made it back. We got into this tiny room with a list of kegs and prices. We're looking at what we're gonna get, and the lady comes over and asks for our IDs. By now, it's just second nature for, and I'm sure Jake too, so we fork them over. After a good 3-4 minutes of looking at Jake's ID and checking the national ID book, she tells him that the book says that his ID is fake. We both kind of stand there and go, "what?". Jake is from Pennsylvania, so he's used to people looking closely at his ID, but it's real. The Pennsylvania Department of Motor Vehicles issued him a valid Pennsylvania driver's license, yet this lady had just told him it was fake... So I ask her, "is there any way for us to prove to you that a real id is real?" And this lady was a HUGE bitch, but then again, who wouldn't be if you were 35, looked 45, and worked at the beer docks. But seriously, if there was ever a time that I wanted to punch a girl, it was definitely then. Anyways, this guy comes over her shoulder and jokingly says, "just give 'em the beer". To that she replied "NO" as if he had been hassling her all day. Again, HUGE bitch. So we go back and forth with her for a few minutes, me getting exponentially more frustrated, until Jake says, "well, that ID would be pretty hard to fake." He was talking about the state and all the counties being printed on the edges and all the holographic shit that's on it. To this, she replied, "actually, it wouldn't be, because it's out of state and we don't know what a real one looks like." Then I got more mad. First, she had a book that has all the ids in it just for this purpose. She had consulted it, but while she did, I noticed it said "2005" with "time-sensitive" below it. You are using an old book which says it needs to be updated, AND you call a real ID fake. Then she said she had just taken a class on this from the OLCC. I should have choke slammed her right then. So she looked in a book AND took a class, and she STILL got it wrong. Wow. After telling us she could get fined if they took it, she handed Jake his "fake" ID back (wouldn't she legally have to take that?) and we left. I was pissed, and even while writing this 2 days later, I'm getting myself worked up about it. We eventually got the keg the next day, so don't worry folks. It was a 1/2 barrel keg of Olympia because Bryan was $1 short of Coors Light. Ironic. It's funny though, because I know somebody who has gone in there with someone who has a fake California ID, and they were fine. FUCK THAT! I thought Cali ID's were made so that they were really hard to fake, but apparently that's wrong, it's clearly Pennsylvania.

But hey, we are having a party tonight, so you should come over.