Sunday, May 13, 2007

Spiderman 3 Movie Review

I just saw this, and I'm going to write this thing short, and try and purge the memory of it from my brain. I'm going to try the buy or sell method.

First thing I'm buying is Bruce Campbell. Awesome. I'll buy everything he sells. I'll sell his agent though. He must have the agent from Extras, because he needs to be in everything, he's hilarious, yet he's reduced to Old Spice commercials. Granted, they're funny, but he needs his own movie and fast.

I'll buy the action scenes, I'll sell every other scene.
I'll buy good Spiderman, but sell emo Spiderman.
I'll buy Venom and Sandman, but sell Mary Jane.
On that note, I'll buy Topher Grace, but sell Kirsten Dunst.
I'll buy the budget, but sell what it bought.
I'll buy the editor of the Daily Bugle, and sell everyone else not already purchased.
I'll buy Sam Raimi, but for Evil Dead IV.
On that note, I'll buy Evil Dead 4, but sell Spiderman 4.

Everything else, including most of the awful, shameful, totally forced and not effective comic relief (the "emo" Peter Parker scenes), I will sell. Actually, I'll put it in a wet cardboard box, write "Free" on it, and leave it on the sidewalk for a few days. Then it's going to the dump. I was told not to see this movie, I didn't want to see this movie, yet I went. I didn't like it at all.

On the Reganometer, I give this movie a 4 out of 10, and say do NOT go see this movie. Like my roommate said, it was like a bad joke that just wouldn't stop.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

This review is helpful. I wasn't planning on seeing it, and now I definitely won't. I only hope the huge amount of money it makes doesn't guarantee an even worse sequel #4.

Happy Mother's Day! We'll be at my mom's from 1:30 until about 6:00 in case you want to call.

D

Anonymous said...

It wasn't all that bad. By no means nearly as good as the first two (Spider-man 2 is probably my favorite movie) but still not as awful as everyone is says. I'd go see it for yourself.

Kevin said...

Don't see it, it's awful. Wait until someone cuts the action scenes together on YouTube and watch that. The rest of the movie was a waste of time and money.

Google