Chuck Norris: Internet superstar

As many of you know, but some of you I'm certain don't (hey Mom, hey Dad), there has been an explosion recently regarding Chuck Norris. Chuck used to be regarded highly as a martial arts fighter, winning Fighter of the Year honors in Black Belt magazine in 1969. Then came the movies, and then the infamous Walker: Texas Ranger television show. The explosion began when NBC acquired Universal, and thus the rights to all Universal content. Among the content, Walker: Texas Ranger. Conan O'Brien took advantage of this on his talk show, Late Night with Conan O'Brien, by installing what he called the "Walker: Texas Ranger lever". It was a lever by his desk that, when pulled, would unleash rediculous clips of Norris' TV show. It quickly became a fan favorite, and the rebirth of Chuck Norris began. The real explosion happened on the internet though, where Chuck Norris "facts" began popping up everywhere. Chuck Norris facts are rediculous myths about Chuck Norris that are so preposterous, they are hillarious. It has become an internet phenomenon, and I would just like to expose everyone to it. Here are 10 of my favorite Chuck Norris facts:

• Chuck Norris watches 60 Minutes in 20 minutes.
• Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now The Islands.
• Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
• The most effective form of suicide known to man is to type "Chuck Norris" into Google and hit "I'm Feeling Lucky!".
• Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
• Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.
• Someone once tried to tell Chuck Norris that roundhouse kicks aren't the best way to kick someone. This has been recorded by historians as the worst mistake anyone has ever made.
• Chuck Norris puts the "laughter" in "manslaughter".
• Chuck Norris has counted to infinity - twice.
• Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
• Chuck Norris was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.

These are just some of the thousands of facts about Chuck Norris. This phenomenon has gotten so large, that I don't even think getting my dad Delta Force 2: The Columbian Connection for Christmas as a gag gift would be funny this year. Maybe I'll stick to Stallone, he's always good for a laugh. Anyways, just felt like posting about Chuck Norris.

P.S. Dad, expect Missing in Action, a Chuck Norris classic.